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Looking at Toxic Behaviours and Self Sabotage.

ateasevalphillips

Updated: Oct 4, 2024

Toxic behaviours are actions or attitudes that can be harmful, destructive, or detrimental to oneself or others. They can manifest in various forms and contexts, but some common examples include:


Manipulation: Trying to control or influence others through deceit, guilt-tripping, or playing mind games.


Dishonesty: Lying, omitting information, or being deceitful, which erodes trust in relationships.


Negative Communication: Constant criticism, belittling, or verbal abuse can be incredibly harmful.


Jealousy and Envy: Feeling resentful or envious of others' successes, leading to unhealthy competition or sabotage.


Passive-Aggressiveness: Expressing hostility or anger indirectly, often through subtle or covert means.


Blame-shifting: Refusing to take responsibility for one's actions and consistently blaming others instead.


Intolerance and Prejudice: Discriminating against others based on race, gender, religion, or any other characteristic.


Controlling Behaviour: Trying to dominate or micromanage others' actions and decisions.


Lack of Empathy: Disregarding or being indifferent to others' feelings, emotions, or needs.


Self-Centeredness: Constantly prioritising oneself without considering the impact on others.


Recognizing these behaviours is crucial for personal growth and maintaining healthy relationships. It's important to address and work on changing these behaviours through self-reflection, seeking support or therapy if needed, and consciously practising healthier ways of interacting with oneself and others.


Now let’s take a look at self-sabotage, which refers to behaviours or actions that consciously or unconsciously hinder personal progress, success, or well-being. It's a complex pattern that often stems from underlying fears, insecurities, or negative self-perceptions. Some common forms of self-sabotage include:


Procrastination: Delaying important tasks or goals, leading to missed opportunities or increased stress.


Negative Self-Talk: Engaging in constant self-criticism or undermining one's abilities, which can impact confidence and motivation.


Fear of Success or Failure: Feeling unworthy of success or fearing the responsibilities that come with it. Similarly, fearing failure can lead to avoiding risks or opportunities.


Avoidance: Dodging challenges or situations that may lead to personal growth or change, staying in a comfort zone despite knowing it's limiting progress.


Perfectionism: Setting unrealistic standards and becoming paralyzed by the fear of making mistakes, leading to inaction or dissatisfaction with accomplishments.


Self-Medication: Using harmful substances or engaging in addictive behaviours to cope with stress or emotions, which can further derail progress.


Overthinking: Getting stuck in a cycle of overanalysing situations, leading to indecision or making poor choices due to excessive doubt.


Understanding the root causes of self-sabotage is essential in addressing and overcoming these behaviours. It often involves self-reflection, building self-awareness, and practising self-compassion. Seeking support from friends, mentors, or professionals such as therapists or coaches can also provide guidance in breaking these patterns and fostering healthier habits and beliefs regarding self-sabotage.


Being able to identify, work through, and overcome toxic behaviours and self-sabotage is incredibly freeing and valuable, it’s a continuous journey towards a more balanced life of wellbeing.

@Ease Creative Integrative Therapies with Val Phillips 2024

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