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Have YOURSELF a Merry Little Christmas P.2

Part 2: Letting Go of Expectations

In Part 1, we explored why Christmas can be so challenging, from financial stress to family dynamics. Now, it’s time to take a closer look at how we can lighten the emotional load of the Christmas season by letting go of the expectations that often weigh us down. By releasing the pressure to live up to a “perfect” Christmas, you can create space for joy, peace, and authenticity.


Redefine What Christmas Means to You

Ask yourself: What do I really want from this time of the year? Is it connection, rest, or maybe just a break from everyday stresses? Often, we adopt traditions and expectations without questioning if they align with our current values or life circumstances.

How to let go:

  • Write down 3-5 things that genuinely matter to you about Christmas.

  • Focus your energy on these priorities, and let the rest fall away.


Avoid “Shoulds”

The Christmas period is full of unspoken rules: You should attend this party. You should see your parents. You should be cheerful. These "shoulds" can create guilt and anxiety, taking the joy out of the season.

How to let go:

  • Replace “should” with “could.” Instead of “I should send Christmas cards,” try “I could send cards, if I want to do that.”

  • Practice saying no. A polite but firm “I can’t this time, but thank you” is enough.


Simplify Gift-Giving

We mentioned in Part 1 that gifts can be a burden, but they can also be a beautiful way to show love and thoughtfulness. Instead of striving for the perfect present, focus on meaningful gestures that reflect your relationships.

How to let go:

  • Try alternative gift ideas, like handmade items, or their favourite chocolate bar!

  • Set clear boundaries about your gift budget and stick to it.


Embrace Imperfection

The tree doesn’t have to be impressive, and the mince pies don’t have to be perfectly baked. Life is messy, and so is Christmas—and that’s okay! The real magic comes from the love and laughter shared, not flawless execution.

How to let go:

  • Celebrate the “good enough.”

  • Find humour in mishaps—burnt turkeys or tangled lights can make for cherished memories.


Create New Traditions

Clinging to old traditions that no longer serve you can feel more like a chore than a celebration. Starting fresh can bring renewed excitement and meaning to the holiday.

How to let go:

  • Reflect on traditions that feel obligatory or draining.

  • Experiment with new things, like a cozy film night, volunteering, or a winter walk.


Focus on Presence, Not Perfection

The most memorable Christmas moments often come from simply being present: sharing a laugh, enjoying a quiet festive drink, or sitting beside a warm fire. When we let go of the need to control every detail, we open ourselves to unexpected joy.

How to let go:

  • Limit distractions by setting aside time for what matters most.

  • Practice gratitude—acknowledge the small joys around you.


Give Yourself Grace

Letting go of expectations doesn’t happen overnight, and that’s okay. Be kind to yourself as you navigate the season, and remember that it’s perfectly fine to do Christmas differently this year. Let this Christmas be a reflection of you—perfectly imperfect.


Stay tuned for Part 3, where we’ll dive into enjoying Christmas day your way. 


@Ease Creative Integrative Therapies with Val Phillips 2024


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